Admittance by Donation

Park & Tilford Garden's Christmas Lights

Or if you’re my family and myself, admittance-by-just-walking-right-on-in-without-donating-a-darn-thing-because-you-never-saw-the-stupid-sign that said “Admission by Donation”.

Of course I didn’t see the large sign that said “Donation” because I was too busy trying to be all purdy to the cute North Vancouver District Firemen who were manning the friggin donation box… keep my boys on a leash…ogling the firemen!

‘Scuze me but I didn’t see the box because it was placed behind four cute firemen and I was trying to figure out what they looked like underneath their getup!

So barrel-on-in we did because we had one mission (and apparently it was not to donate anything). We were going to play hide and seek, in the dark, in the gardens, surrounded by Christmas lights, me, the boys, my Mom and sister.

So play hide and seek we did, like we do every year. Two teams walking around the Christmas-light-decked-out-garden trying to spy on each other without getting into too much trouble or knocking too many people over.

All the while my Dad took pictures:

So upon leaving, for some reason I turned around for one last look at the firemen, and I noticed the “Admittance by Donation” sign.

Oh my God, we’re a bunch of criminals. I can only hope that this truck load of boys DOES doesn’t arrive at my house should I need them, and recognize me for the cheapskate I am.

"Oh, the silent majesty of a winter's morn...

...the clean, cool chill of the holiday air... an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer."

Clark Griswold, staring out his window looking at Eddie empty his RV toilet into the sewer.

Christmas Vacation - probably one of my most favourite Christmas movies ever, ever, ever.

I try to watch all of the Christmas specials on TV with my kids:

• The original cartoon How the Grinch Stole Christmas - awesome!!
• Frosty the Snowman - wouldn't be Christmas without him
• Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - I sometimes feel like a misfit too
• It's a Wonderful Life - such an amazing classic movie
• A Christmas Carol - probably one of my all time faves from when I was a child. The one with George C. Scott is the best
• The Polar Express - a new favourite added to the list within the last few years. The colours and screenplay are amazing

But of course, nothing beats Clark Griswold and his antics.

"Clark, we're stuck under a truck."

"We were gonna call, but Eddie wanted to make it a surprise"
"If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am right now."

Happy Griswold!